New Directions

Yes, that's a reference to Glee. Oh well. I'm too tired to create my own post heading right now.

I've decided to start a new blog for my personal pursuit of self-improvement. For right now, this will mainly be concerned with certain behaviors I'm actively trying to incorporate, focusing on one in particular: improvement with women.

One aspect of this is hitting the streets with Stefan and Chaka, two guys who have recently become friends of mine. Stefan and I go out on weekdays, Chaka and I on weekends. I'm considering including other guys in the group for the weekends too, but that's a topic for later.

So I've decided to record certain things, like how much time I spent, how many girls or groups of girls I approached and what the results were, as well as anything I consider worthy of note.

I didn't actually take down any notes, so I'm going from memory, but last Sunday (which would be April 24th) I started with Chaka at about 3:30pm and finished at 5:30pm. We walked up to five sets each. The approach was simply asking girls to take us from Namba Parks to Takashimaya, and then from Takashimaya to Namba Parks. All my approachs were much smoother, and there was a pair of girls who were warming up to us pretty easily, so I used the "I'm a bartender around here, you should come to my bar" excuse and got her email address. She wrote back, actually, but we still haven't set up a time to meet. I think there's a good chance we will again. I also asked a girl on her cell phone listening to music to take us to Namba Parks. She was cute, a 8 or 9, and she put up some resistance at first, but gradually warmed up. I even offered her to let us find the place ourselves, but she insisted on taking us all the way. At the end she said "Mata ne" (See you), so I used that to get her address. She hasn't written back, but it was still cool. Never gotten two closes on the street in one night. At a bar or party, sure, but not on the street.

Later that night I went home with a girl who I'd talked to two or three times and works at a bar. Half Filippina, Half Japanese, 23 years old, sexy eyes, nice tits. Hope to see her again, but we'll see.

The odd thing is after this (for me) phenomenal success, I felt MORE nervous. I feel like now that I'm aware I'm capable of more than just saying hi and asking for directions, it means either a) it's already time for me to step up, which is going to expose me to more failure and discomfort, at least initially or b) I may start to feel a bit of monotony at continuing what I'm doing now, which is building a foundational base.

On Tuesday, April 26th, I went out with Stefan. That was my 4th time so far (I don't recall the first two very well, so I'm not including them), and I've noticed a pattern: Generally the first 5 or so approaches all feel very rough, like when I stretch before exercise. After that, I kind of get into a groove, rhythm or flow and it feels a lot more natural. Not necessarily easy, but... more effortless. Like exercise, I'm sure this will be rough at first and I'll have a lot of mental and psychological resistance to it, which is probably why it was a good idea to bring friends with me.

I've also decided to start asking a ton of girls on mixi to meet me for dates and such. I'm going to start with girls who have fewer mixi friends themselves, as they would be less useful as networking contacts, and then move on to girls who are not on my mixi or have nothing to do with my mixi.

I'm going out again with Chaka this coming weekend and Stefan the following week during the week. I'm seeing Kayo tomorrow night, Tamaki on Sunday, having a small house party on Tuesday and then Ai on Wednesday and Thursday. Should be fun.

I still have a lot to learn, which is intimidating, but I'm doing something about it, which is very empowering.